Merry Christmas! I know I can say such “controversial” words to you without offending your intelligence, and I have every confidence you will not spit back in my face a snarky reply to the very notion of my having bestowed a religious salutation upon you.
I was shopping online for “a gift for the man who has everything” (that’s you, Bob) and I saw this advertisement for an amazing looking BMW. When I clicked on the link for that ad, there was another link to a sharp looking Rolex watch. I went to that link, and it led to a series of news articles, three articles in all.
The first article informed me as to how I could purchase a seat for you on a Vrigin Galactic space flight. The second article explained how I could get you a lifetime-supply of peanut-butter and chocolate pies, cakes, and pastries. The last article had an awesome picture of a Krampus, a demonic-looking creature of European Alpine folklore which abducts children whom share the unfortunate distinction of earning a place on Santa Claus’ naughty list.
Given all of the choices above, I thought about it really hard, and I chose the one that I know means the most to you. So here ya go:
Perhaps a nice atheistic holiday expression should go something like this:
“May Krampus never show up at the foot of your bed to abduct you in your sleep!”
I am working on Holiday Blog Cards for the rest of the Rogues over the course of the next 2 weeks. Stay tuned!